The key to well-being and happiness is being autonomous.
from http://kinetictruth.com/2011/12/31/declare-your-personal-independence-i-hereby-secede/
As you do the work of love, you accept to be fully responsible for your life, to be fully autonomous, and self-sufficient through your connection with Love or God. You no longer make others responsible for your comfort, happiness, or well-being or expect others to conform to your will.
When you seek love in another, may your love not be compensation for what you feel you lack or long for—comfort, security, affection, a balm to our wounds, companionship…whatever.
Step back from mad love affairs or capricious partnerships of all kinds–whether romantic, professional, or social. Learn to respect yourself and others and the opportunity of a potential mature union and communion.
Be co-creative and not co-dependent.
Stay true to your Divine path and your higher calling. Be your own true love first.
Salvation is personal. Between you and God and nobody else. Choose someone who is committed to the work of Love. Support each other to refine yourselves so you can truly share love.
And in terms of your longings…
No one in the world can give you the “new life” that you dream of. Only the Creator can renew you.
Whatever you seek in another, seek it in the Divine Love that is your essence first. A healthy union cannot come in response to a wound or in a wanting, it must be with integration with your Divinity that will heal the wound and accept the higher opportunity of the union.
Each one of us must take responsibility for ourselves, our own happiness. Let go of all the things you hoped that a partner (or anything outside yourself) would fulfill in you.
The right partner will make this commitment with you. He or she will seek true love and not a passing fancy. He or she will be one you can grow with, one who can really respect and love you for who you are and be able to nurture that through her loving.
But you must be strong yourself to find someone who has that kind of strength.
No one will come along to make you complete, to fulfill you, or be an answer to your problems or give you happiness, comfort, whatever…
The key to well-being and happiness is being autonomous. That is, not making others responsible for your happiness or well-being, and not feeling responsible for that of others. If you love them, you’ll let them take responsibility for themselves.
There are no victims, there is no one to blame, no one to save. No one owes anybody anything. No one is responsible for anyone’s joy or pain, and there is no one to make demands to.
There is only you taking responsibility for your own life and destiny. Only you can accept to live in tune with the Creator’s Love.
Remember: You are never alone in this endeavor. For as you are committed to the law of Love, you are Divinely supported. Take strength from that. And find your freedom.